Doing more of what makes you happy

 

“You don’t become blissful by simply knowing about bliss, but rather you become permeated through and through with an ineffable quality that energizes, inspires, guides and connects you to the larger whole.”

bliss defined

Bliss is usually defined as an emotional state characterized by perfect happiness, or at the very least by contentment, positive feelings, joy and pleasure.

My own definition is pretty straightforward and practical: it’s simply doing more of what makes you happy and less of what doesn’t.

However, what makes you truly happy can be a rather thorny affair.  Odd, isn’t it?  You’d think that would be the easy part.  Unfortunately, the intricate and often mystifying dynamics of body, mind and spirit, all mixed up with cultural beliefs and rules, family dynamics, social pressure and our own limiting beliefs of “shoulda, coulda, woulda”, create quite a distance between what you think will bring happiness and what you end up with.

cutting through the complications

So, how do you cut through all these complications and get to the heart and soul of personal happiness?  Well, most of time we do nothing and hope for the best.  Hoping that something, someone, somehow, someday will come along and change everything.  This is probably not the best use of a human life.

the benefits of obstacles

For me, personally, I was blessed with panic “disorder”.  My only choice was work with this or let it take me down.  I had a deep sense that the progressive frequency of the panic attacks was throwing my body into a physiological danger zone. The constant  flooding of stress hormones probably wasn’t a good thing.  My mental well being was also at risk.  I felt like I was losing my mind several times a day.  It was all exhausting, frightening  and seemingly out of control.

One of the things that counteracted  this fear, trembling and dread was paying attention to brief moments when things were OK.  I learned to lean into simple moments of joy.  I figured out how to expand these sensations through the body and make them my own. I started doing gratitude practices through out the day, just noticing how amazing it is to be alive, to breathe, walk, talk, enjoy food and company… things like that.

It started slow.  It didn’t seem to be making much of a difference.  But now I am so permeated with this practice, it’s just part of the way I of think, interact and live my life.  Such a small thing, such a big difference.

practice

This simple practice is about pay attention to the ordinary.  This could be anything: the way the sunlight warms you in just the right way, a thankfully cool breeze on a hot day, the flavor and warmth of your morning coffee, the precious smile on your child’s face… you get the picture.

Then, stay with whatever joyful moment shows up for a few seconds longer.  Imagine the sensation filling your body. You can give it a color or texture if you like. Play with it. Experiment. Pay attention to the changing feelings and sensations.  Watch it dissipate and notice if you chase after it trying to make it permanent.

It just takes a few extra seconds, but the cumulative effect is nothing short of transformational.

questions:

• Where do the small moments of joy in your life show up?
• Can you stay present with whatever brings joy without telling yourself a story about it?
• Can you let joy fill your body, heart and spirit; again, without making a big deal out of it?
• Can you expand this joy… making it bigger, more intense, brighter?
• Do you notice that as you engage in this practice, it simply occurs to you to engage more often?
• Make a list of all the moments from the last week that were joyful, fun, connected or magical?  How many of these moments did you cultivate on the spot?  How many just passed you by?
• Imagine how different life would be if you spent more time cultivating happiness… really, just imagine.